The Team that Can Laugh Together
Updated 14 January 2022
Caveat lector: Can there be anything more humorless than writing about humor?
Meetings in the professional workplace are an unavoidable reality. If you don't have time to read all the advice on conducting meetings published over the decades (and who does?), do not despair. As a public service, I will sum it up pretty succinctly for you:
Don't waste people's time.
While this advice is golden, like all admonitions it can be taken too far, such as when policy or practice effectively bans all enjoyment and frivolity from the meeting space or even the workspace. Whether such bans be the byproduct of a fusty workplace culture or the official policy of some stern Scrooge McDuck boss, meetings in this setting are gloomy affairs that revolve around reiterating common knowledge, tussling over rules of order, mumbling on and on about "housekeeping items," and finally just tabling the business at hand. In fact, the only agenda item that has any chance of rousing the dozy participants is the call to adjourn. To anyone who has been subjected to such barren meetings, you know that they can be a source of stress themselves. There is a certain sterility in these settings that all by itself provokes an anxiety akin to waiting alone in a doctor's examination room for a ghastly diagnosis.
No, you may scrub meetings and workspaces with antiseptics all you want, but employees will all persist, stubbornly and hideously, as human beings with all their lumpiness, desires, and gaseous emissions. A wise leader knows to capitalize on our shared humanity to construct a healthier and more productive workplace by allowing and encouraging (and never insisting upon!) levity. For, it is a fact that the team that can laugh together can work together.
To be sure, humor can be a risky thing in the workplace. A leader who is not confident in his or her ability to crack a joke should probably not try too hard, but that does not preclude allowing others to trip the light comedic. For those who fear they are humor challenged, I recommend conducting this simple "humor audit," which will help gauge your inclination to laugh.
Of course, certain rules of decorum and decency must never be compromised. Humor can lead, intentionally or unintentionally, to sharp divisions between insiders and outsiders, so humor in the workplace is best if inclusive. And humor should land within the parameters that are generally accepted in your specific workplace's culture or in the culture at large, which means that a budding jokester needs to have a good idea what those shared parameters are. Some workplaces may be more tolerant of lighthearted irreverence, for instance. Others, may demand a certain decorum with strict attention paid to the niceties of proper respect, the hierarchical strictures of subordination, and the astringent mores of Victorian stoicism. In other words, some places will be lively, light, and fun and others will feel like an ongoing funeral home visit.
And the humor should never be demeaning to individuals or groups, including individuals and groups not represented at the meeting or in that workplace. Cracking a joke about a colleague who is participating in a meeting or about an identity group represented during the meeting can be rude, alienating, and at least borderline bullying. Cracking a joke about someone not in the meeting or an identity group not represented is undoubtedly crude, cowardly, and unduly cruel. Whatever the case, such attempts at humor are potentially discriminatory. If the moral imperative toward decency is not enough to maintain order, everyone should be painfully conscious that inappropriate humor is not only offensive, but it is often legally actionable as well.
In addition, humor in the workplace should not become a stand-up routine with one individual cracking up the room. And, if you are the boss attempting some sort of improv act, just go ahead and assume that every titter from every person in the room has effectively been coerced, a sure way to sow seeds of discontent. If your position allows no hecklers, why the heck are you on stage? Not convinced? Simply chew on this phrase: "enforced fun and levity on command." Mmm. Delicious.
Whatever your role in the workplace, if you fantasize about standing in front of an exposed brick wall, a spotlight in your eyes and microphone in your hand, you best not test your material during a business meeting. And bosses beware, if only one or two people are cracking wise during meetings, that can be a sign of dysfunctional stress even if everyone is laughing. The fact is that your jokester is just trying to break the tension that your meeting is generating. I know. I have been that lone clown many, many times.
Alternately, there are ways to open up the floor for everyone to participate, but doing so will require conscious effort and — shudder — sharing the spotlight. Even the seemingly humorless can shine in these settings.
Personally, I have been told that my sense of humor can be a tad dry and, well, sardonic, so I have to read the room carefully. Needless to say, my reading comprehension in such situations can be limited, so recently, I took this cool Humor Typology Test created by the authors of the excellent book Humor, Seriously. The test plots your humor style using four categories:
Magnet
Sweetheart
Stand-Up, and
Sniper.
Despite my own apparent shortcomings in the humor department, I have long embraced the notion that the team that can laugh together can work together. I have witnessed employees file into a dreaded meeting room, heads down with glum looks, anxiously gripping computers and notepads only to see them later emerge upbeat, smiling, and chortling with each other, feeling good about themselves, their colleagues, and the task at hand. What made the difference? Levity and laughter. Laughter combined with basic decency can help cut through the politics and self doubt that plague every organization and individual.
My point is that while humor is a positive in the workplace and particularly in meetings, it is neither a panacea nor an absolute. I reiterate. If humor is not your thing, don't force it but do allow room for (appropriate) humor from others. And feel free to let loose and laugh when you feel like it. Humor is one of those qualities that makes us most human and reinforces our status as social beings. When encouraged and deployed wisely in the workplace, it can raze barriers and silos and raise spirits and collegiality. Humor can help build and maintain teams, which is good for every organization. So don't fear or denigrate humor. Embrace it and use it as a vital tool for team building and workplace functionality.
And remember: the team that can laugh together can work together.
Check out the research and wisdom of Jennifer Aaker and Naomi Bagdonas. You can hear them explain their study of workplace humor in this TED Talk. Also, I highly recommend their book, Humor Seriously: Why Humor Is a Secret Weapon in Business and Life (And how anyone can harness it. Even you.)
The hardcover is available at Amazon here. I provided the link to the hardcover because I think their book is that good.
What is the tone in your workplace? How often do you and others laugh (together and not at each other)? How can you and your organization benefit from a lighter touch?
Life is too short and work is too long to never smile, and I can help you lighten the tone. Click below for your free consultation.
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