Before we begin, I want to remind you that I have a new book out, Greater than Great. If you appreciate or just enjoy my writing and ideas, you’ll love Greater than Great! You’ll find much in it that’s familiar, and a lot that’s new. Check it out on Amazon. It also makes a great gift for your favorite leader… or your lousy boss!
I'm hanging in the balance of the reality of man.
Bob Dylan, “Every Grain of Sand”
You’re a good person. I’m a good person. That woman over there, see her? She’s a good person. The man right past her, the one kicking his dog, he’s a good person too.
Are you buying any of this?
Please don’t.
We are all some measure of good and some measure of bad. But what if there were a way to gauge one’s decency? What if there were a scale where we could weigh a person’s good against that same person’s bad? If on one side of the scale you put all your good stuff and on the other all your bad stuff, which would weigh more?
While these questions may come across as idle philosophical musings, for leaders they’re a practical necessity. Leaders must keep these questions in the back of their minds at all times, except when they move them to the front. Leaders must weigh the relative goodness of each team member and colleague, but they especially must weigh their own. Since people’s words and actual actions often diverge, this weighing requires careful observation.
Can we all agree that actually doing good should weigh more than just intending to do good or saying you’re doing good? And maybe doing good for all the right reasons should weigh even more. Should merely intending to do good have any weight at all, or does it only count if we actually do the good we intend?
As I’ve written elsewhere, our ethics is a practice—an action—and not just a state of being. So, I would argue that failing to follow through on our intention to do good is no good at all. Furthermore, doing good unintentionally—that is, by accident—isn’t an act of good anymore than unintentionally doing bad is bad.
Which leaves us with a dilemma. If everyone thinks they’re doing good even when they do bad, does that get everyone off the hook? I don’t think so, particularly if they’re indifferent to the harm they produce.
Let’s look at it another way. It seems axiomatic that doing bad should weigh heavily on our scale and that doing bad for all the wrong reasons should be heaviest of all. So would you put bad intentions on the scale? It seems horribly unfair to weigh someone’s random thoughts. Should you be judged by that fleeting fantasy where you wish violence on the guy who’s parked over the line. Should you feel guilty about your suppressed urge to sneak a quick grape at the supermarket?
No, it wouldn’t be right. It’s a ridiculous burden, and one I reject. Does the burden of bad thoughts belong on our scale, though? If so, would good thoughts and intentions serve as a counterweight?
I’m inclined to say let’s leave thoughts and intentions out of the equation altogether and just stick with actions. Organizational psychologist John Amaechi, a thinker I greatly admire, makes the point that we have little ability to eliminate our biases, but we have total control as to whether we act on them, which makes sense to me.
If you have a foul unconscious bias—such as prejudice against a certain people—willing the bias away is nearly impossible. Instead, to be good, you must intend to act against that negative bias.
Then again there’s the matter of doing the right thing for the right reason and its opposite. Those intents—good or bad—really do shift “the balance of the reality of man.”
So, maybe we should only weigh intentions when they’re attached to subsequent actions as Amaechi suggests. Therefore, what you do is who you are, and who you are is what you do. I like that.
Churchiness vs. Virtuousness
I know of a religious guy who believed that church and missionary work are inherently virtuous. I don’t subscribe to that precise moral code, but he certainly did or at least frequently professed it. So, because he regularly went to church and did missionary work, he fervently believed in his own goodness. Groovy.
But I also happen to know that he attended his church and performed his missionary work alongside an individual who apparently struck his fancy, a married woman—not his own wife—who was also his employee. Super groovy.
I don’t know the intimate workings of his inner life, but let’s speculate that all this effort that he spent performing ostensibly righteous acts found some lubrication in his desire to be close to this woman whom he seemed to secretly and obsessively love and/or lust after.
If so, did he practice a goodness pure enough to counteract his true motivations, or did his ulterior motives sully his activities? Also, what effect did all this secrecy and subterfuge have on his other behaviors? Did his moral elasticity in one area manifest as or mimic his self-serving corruption in others?
I can confirm that the answer to this last question is “yes.” The more he flaunted appearances and indulged in personal hypocrisy, the more rapidly he rasped away his professional integrity.
To be fair, I know of no evidence nor have any reason to believe that he and she ever consummated his apparent desires. Nonetheless, they seemed to eat at him, corroding his very self and every action, rusting away inside and out.
Moral Practice vs. Self-Absolution
“Oh, but if I don't do it, you know somebody else will”
Dr. John, “Such a Night”
I guess all we have left is trying to do as much good as possible for the right reasons, which requires self-assessment, candor, and constant adjustment.
For instance, saying to ourselves “well, if I don’t do it, someone else will, and that’ll be worse” or “it’s not illegal” or “yeah, it’s not legal, but everyone else is doing it” or “I just have to push through this one bad thing, and then I’ll be able to do some good” or “sure, it sucks what I’m doing, but look at the results” won’t cut it. If you’re doing bad, that’s bad, plain and simple. Knock it off.
If you’re a boss, deceiving your people or concealing your decisions because you know better than anyone and you’re really a good person inside and you mean well and what they don’t know won’t hurt them and, and, and . . . you’re just pulling a con job on yourself. You’re probably not pulling it on them. They’re either wise to you or living in bottomless denial. You’re lying to yourself, though. Just like everyone knew what the churchy guy with the married love interest was up to.
I think we have to conclude that the ultimate proof of goodness or badness is in the action combined with the intent. Amaechi counsels us to intend to act against our heinous inclinations. In that spirit, let’s focus on actually trying to do good because it’s the right thing.
By the way, I don’t mean to come across as judgy and self-righteous here. I’m not a moralist in any philosophical or theological sense, and I’m not sure how the balance of my personal good and bad would come out in the end. As with everyone, it’s a mix.
I did learn, though, a long time ago, that it’s best to avoid judging people just by my standards. It takes a constant effort, but I try to judge others first based on their own professed values instead. And it can be eye opening, as with that hypocritical, churchy guy I described. Furthermore, I try to judge myself the same way: by my own principles.
That’s the best measure for all leaders—to start by turning that approach inward, to judge ourselves by our own standards of behavior. Ask yourself, “how does this action reflect my values?” Doing so takes some serious resolve, certainly more than just dismissing or excusing our bad behavior. Rationalizing is as easy as it’s satisfying and so can become habitual. Honest intent is more challenging yet utterly vital.
Leaders, thus, must start with themselves as always. They must determine their relative goodness by viewing their choices and actions through the lens of their values and make adjustments accordingly. They must behave in ways that reflect their standards. There are no substitutes. Only then can they dare to observe others. Fundamentally, it’s a matter of integrity.
How do you assess the goodness of yourself and others? Do you first judge others by their own standards?
Great leaders need tools and strategies for assessing trustworthiness and decency, and I can help.
Unlock the Great Leader Within! Download my free resource, the Transform To GREATness Toolkit, now!
I look forward to hearing from you.
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About Dr. Sal
I founded Guidance for Greatness to mentor rising professionals after serving 30 years in higher education as an English professor, dean, and VP.
In my speaking, writing, and coaching, I blend academic credentials (Ph.D. from Toronto, certificates from Harvard and ACE) with practical coaching certifications (Tiny Habits, Thrive Global) to offer something different: leadership development built upon human decency.
My mission? To guide today’s managers to become the next generation of great leaders.
I offer practical, values-driven strategies so that managers can lead authentically.
Why? Because great leaders aren't just effective managers—they're teachers whose example makes a true difference in the world.
It’s here!
Discover the practical strategies that transform good managers into exceptional leaders. Look for my new book, Greater than Great: How to Excel in Leadership through Learning, Logic, and Life to Make a True Difference in the World, out now!
Don’t just take my word for it. Theresa says, “If you’ve ever looked at the state of leadership today and thought, ‘Surely, we can do better than this,’ then this book will feel like both a reality check and a rallying cry. In Greater Than Great, Jim Salvucci doesn’t just talk about leadership—he invites you to rethink it from the inside out.”
Martin writes, “This book may change the way that you think about yourself and the way you lead your life, as you consider the true meaning of leadership.”
Grab a copy for yourself and for that special leader in your life (or your lousy boss)!
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