Chilly wind sharp as a razor blade
House on fire, debts unpaid
Gonna stand at the window, gonna ask the maid
Have you seen dignity?
Bob Dylan
Do you offer others dignity?
What if I told you that there is a resource of endless increase that would benefit you and those around you? That this resource is readily available to each and every one of us, that it is inexpensive, and that expending it can result in a full return with interest. That the only byproduct of using it is goodwill and trust.
If this resource were a stock, you would be foolish not to invest in it. If this resource were a commodity, you would snap it up. If this resource could be used as fuel, you would start pumping it into your gas tank.
I will go further. Offering this resource to others will make your work easier in the long run and more satisfying. It will make your relationships more fulfilling. If you are a leader, you could supply it to your people endlessly and watch them flourish. If you are a service provider, this resource is vital to cultivating your clients, who will likely return the favor. In truth, the more you pay it out, the more you get it back.
What is this magic elixir that lubricates win after win and makes winners of us all? It must be snake oil, right?
Let me tell you a story.
I have mentioned elsewhere that my father is in his advanced years and that he struggles with health problems. He is currently in an assisted living facility and is laid up with endless pain. He is helpless to get himself in and out of bed or a chair. He simply can no longer walk.
His quality of life is poor. He is usually stuck in one spot — bed or his wheelchair — all day. The facility staff is supposed to help him get around, and some do. Others are inattentive and even hostile toward this helpless man.
Of course, there are also staffing shortages. Admittedly it is hard under the best of circumstances to get workers to do what many would regard as an unpleasant job — dealing with individuals in various stages of decline. With Covid and all its attendant repercussions — infection, debilitation, quarantines, the Great Resignation, inflation, and of course death — it must be well-nigh impossible to get adequate coverage for every shift while maintaining standards through training and supervision.
All these challenges are on top of dealing with a bunch of feeble and cranky old people who are more isolated than normal and exceedingly anxious and impatient. I have spoken to a few of these residents. Some are talkative and warm if a bit impatient. Others? Well, nuff said. My father tends to be overly anxious but exceedingly polite: please, thank you, and pardon.
That is the context. Meanwhile many of the aids who attend to my father are good and some excellent, but a few have been monsters. They verbally abuse him, refuse to help him, and leave him alone for hours. If he calls for help, they blast him for bothering them. Often all he wants is to be dressed properly or to be brought to the bathroom. Instead he is met with cruelty and viciousness when certain aids are on the job.
Of course I have had to intervene with the management and have gotten some abusive aids in trouble. I am reluctant to do so, though, because I know their job is hard and that the pay is probably pretty low. Also, I don’t want to be complaining all the time particularly since most of the aids are fine. Finally, I recognize that their jobs are full of their own indignities, and I want to be respectful of that reality.
But I draw the line at allowing people to treat my father like shit.
Notice the irony. I find myself concerned about the dignity of these aids while some of those same aids have little regard for my father’s dignity. Whatever his exterior condition, inside he still has the full depth of human thoughts, emotions, and perceptions. But even if he were more cognitively limited, the most basic fact is that he is still a person and deserves to be treated as such.
And what happens when aids treat him with dignity? His heart lightens, his complaints lessen, he is more active, and he praises his aids for doing their jobs. He recognizes how difficult it must be to look after him. He takes an interest in them. He cares.
I am sure that those aids who offer dignity go home exhausted but no more so than the cruel ones. I am willing to bet that the kind ones, though, arrive home with a bit of satisfaction in their hearts knowing that they did a good day’s work, that they made someone whose life is generally a misery feel just a little better. Such is the power of dignity.
The price of dignity is slight. It requires only empathy, compassion, human decency, and a positive outlook. But it pays dividends. Everyone’s a winner when dignity is in play.
So the magic win-win elixir is dignity.
And dignity doesn’t just pertain to eldercare. Bosses who offer their people basic human dignity (you knew I was going there) will reap rewards such as loyalty, productivity, and a more functional workplace. Dignity manifests as compassion and understanding as well as trust and autonomy. One study found that 95% of those surveyed associated a culture of dignity with a healthy work environment. Everyone’s a winner!
Contrast that with bosses who regularly serve up indignity — sadly too common. Their days are filled with egoism, distrust, micromanagement, burnout, and dysfunction. Still, it seems so much easier in the short run to deny dignity. After all, offering dignity is an active choice, not something that happens by accident, but the benefits are massive.
As with so many choices pertaining to great leadership, this one seems obvious and yet escapes so many.
Dignity is such a small investment for such a vast return. Have you seen dignity?
How do you feel when you are denied dignity? How actively do you offer others dignity?
Becoming a great leaders means learning how to tap into the power of dignity, and I can help. Click below for your free consultation and gift.
If you want to learn more about how to become a great leader in this world of bad bosses, visit GuidanceForGreatness.com.
You can ask questions or make suggestions by emailing me directly at
I would love for you to join the conversation by leaving a comment. Likes and reviews are always welcome as well.
Please share this post on social media.
And be sure to SUBSCRIBE to have On Leading with Greatness sent weekly to your inbox.
Share this post